Pūrongo Whakahaere a Hawke's Bay
I taua wā he rerekē to mātau wheako omaoma, mai i te "he aha tōu tikanga 'he aha taku tere'?" ki te "Ka tono nui ahau i ngā hiko ia rua wiki". Heoi anō, i whakaae mātau ki te haere ki Napier ki te whakamātau i tēnei mea oma. Mai i te pungarehu o te pō i whānau mai ai a RFC (Running Footers Club) - he rōpū Rautaki o ngā kaiomaoma wannabe me ā rātou ake hongere Strava me Slack.
ŪPOKO II - 1 RĒHI TAKAWARE ME TE 8 MARAMA WHAKANGUNGU
E kore ahau e hōhā i a koe ki ngā taipitopito nerdy mai i a mātau whakangungu marama. Engari, anei tētahi kupu whakataki ki te tīma RFC me te mātātoa i roto i ētahi tau.
E whakamōhio ana i te tīma RFC:- Oliver, te Mihini. Kaha: te ōritetanga me te sass Strava. Ngoikoretanga: e whakaaro ana ko te physiotherapy, he rite tonu ki te whenua papatahi, ehara i te mea tūturu. I hainatia mō Hawke's ✔️ - Fraser, the Speed Demon. Kaha: tere. Ngoikoretanga: e kore e whakapono ki ngā mea whakamīharo o te okiokinga, ngā mahere whakangungu, te omaoma pōturi rānei. I hainatia mō Hawke's ✔️ - Sonia, te Coyote Croatian. Kaha: kāore i te whāwhā mō te whakataetae. Ngoikoretanga: kāore i te āta whakataetae (he nui rawa hoki te tarakona pāpori kia whai wā mō te whakangungu). I hainatia mō Hawke's ✔️ - Lila, te Looney tawhiti. Kaha: Blackcurrant Powerade. Ngoikoretanga: he ngāwari noa iho te hōhā - i te tino hōhā, nā reira i tāruatia e ia tana tawhiti rēhi "mō te tānga anake". I hainatia mō Hawke's ✔️ - Chris, the Race Legend. Kaha: te whakakā i tana Strava mō tētahi ngohe (āe, ko te tango i ngā ipu e tatau ana). Ngoikoretanga: kāore i taea te haere ki Hawke's Bay.- Liam, te Cantabrian Clopper. Kaha: e whakapono ana ko te oma he "wheako tangata tuatahi", nā reira he mātao tonu te āhua. Ngoikoretanga: ka āwangawanga ina oti i a ia te oma me te kore e whai taitara Strava pai.- Tohu, te Cameo Rongonui. Kaha: e rua anake te oma, engari he ngāwari noa iho te tukituki i ngā mea e rua. Ngoikoretanga: i ātete ki te uru ki te karakia.- Kate, te Jogger Waea-mai. Kaha: e rere ana i roto i te wera 30 waeine. Ngoikoretanga: he tawhiti rawa ki te uru atu ki te ngahau.
ŪPOKO III - TE RĒHI
Tere whakamua ki te mutunga o Aotearoa - i te tiki ake a Fraser, Oliver, Sonia me ahau i a mātau bibs rēhi mai i te Napier i-Site, i te mōhio i runga i te wehi me te whakaongaonga i ngā mea i whakaaetia e mātau ki te mahi (hāunga a Oliver - kāore ia i te wheako i ngā whakaaro).
He arokē te hōtoke i te studio, ā, he nui tonu a mātau i runga i a mātau pereti. Ahakoa kua noho te oma hei wheako whakaaroaro (e ai ki a David Shrigley: "oma oma oma oma oma atu i ō kawenga"), he pūtaiao pū hoki te whakangungu he uaua ki te whārite i ētahi atu wāhi o te ora. Hei tāpiri atu ki te āmaimai, i te kākari tonu māua ko Fraser ki ngā whara o nā noa nei, kāore i te mōhio mēnā ka mahi tahi o māua waewae.
Heoi anō, i whakatapua mātou ki te kite i tēnei mātātoa, ā, i whakahauhautia (nui ake) e te kī taurangi o tētahi inu koreutu i tērā taha. Kī tonu ngā ringa i ngā tauira ārai ārai koreutu, ka hoki mātau ki o mātau rūma hōtēra ki te whārōrō, ki te moe me te whāngai i te hurihanga whakamutunga o te utanga warowaihā i mua i te rā nui.
I te rā o te rēhi, ka mihia mātau e te rā me te hau iti (he pai ki ngā Pōneke e whakamahia ana ki ngā wātū tere 70 km/h). E hiahia ana mātau ki te waimarie tētahi ki tētahi, ka whakaae ki te tūtaki i te raina whakamutunga, a, ka oma atu - he rāhuitia ki ngā mahi pēnei i te "TUKUA!". I roto i te 2-4 haora ka huihuia mātau, ka whakahekea ngā electrolytes me te whakawhiti hū oma mō ngā rēreti hāneanea ake. Ahakoa he rerekē to mātau wheako o te rēhi (ngā wā harikoa e whakaatu ana i te pūoro pai, te whakahoa me te āhua o te whakatutukitanga /versus/ ngā wā uaua e whakaatu ana i ngā mamae mai i te pupuhi me te puku ki te ngenge whānui), ka whakawhiti katoa mātau i te raina whakamutunga me te tino whakahīhī.
I a mātau e noho ana i runga i tētahi pātītī pātītī i te whare wāina o Elephant Hill me ngā pouaka pizza wātea e rua hei hunga whakarongo, ka whakaae mātau ki a mātau wikitōria:
- I oti i a Sonia tētahi hāwhe marathon 2x wiki noa iho i muri i te oma 27 km mō te aroha. Ahakoa kāore a ia i kī, i te whakanui hoki mātau i tana whakaotinga i te mahinga 8 marama me te kore whara.- I te mutunga ka patua e Oliver tana whāinga o te hāwhe marathon i raro i te 1h30 - he hiahia i aukati ai ia i tana rēhi whakamutunga. Kāore a ia i tino hākinakina mōna anō, i te mātao i ngā wā katoa, i whakamahia ki te katoa o te mahi, ā, tērā pea i whakamā i to mātau ngahau tamariki. - I kitea e Fraser kāore he rohe o tōna manawanui ki te mamae. E kīia ana ko te "kaingākau ana mamae" (āe, he masochist rānei), ka oma a ia i tōna whara hope mō te mutunga 1h33 meneti. - I oma tōu pono i te 42.2km katoa ahakoa te turi turi, i whakaoho i te whakatutukitanga me te taitara o te "marathoner/runner tika" ka hokona wawetia mo te kī taurangi o tētahi atu tākaro.
Ki a māua ko Sonia, he wā anō te mātātoa ki te kohi moni mō ētahi o ā māua aroha makau, e whakaranu ana i te pakihi me te ahuareka. Tirohia tētahi pou mō tēnei i konei.
I muri i te rēhi, ka māhorahora mātau mō ētahi rā i Hawke's Bay, e hākinakina ana ngā tirohanga hei tūruhi, ehara i te kaiomaoma (ahakoa i te kitenga i te taha wai o Napier ka tū tonu ngā makawe i muri i taku kakī). I hīkoi mātou i ngā whare wāina, i ngā hōpua wera, ā, i whai wāhi mātou ki te toro i tētahi o ngā taunga takahi o tā mātou kiritaki, a Hastings, ki te tango pikitia o tā mātou whakaingoa anō. Ka mutu, ka hoki mātou ki Pōneke, ka kōrerorero i ngā mea e penapena ana mō te wā heke mai me te ātete i te hiahia ki te waitohu mō tētahi atu takahanga.
ŪPOKO IV - HE AHA INĀIANEI?
E kore e kī, kei te ora tonu a RFC. He torutoru noa iho ngā mema o te tīma e mahi kē ana ki tētahi atu rēhi, ā, ko ētahi e whakaae ana ki te whakatā, ka hoki whakamuri anake ki Strava ki te whakawhāiti i aua uaua taitara auaha. I tēnei rā, he hongere Slack tā mātou mō te kōrerorero whakahaere ngaio (tino!), i a mātou e whakauru ana ki te Whakahaere 72, i whakaritea e Lads without Labels - he takahanga kua āwhina mātou ki te whakatairanga.
Kia mataara ki ētahi atu kōwhai kōwhai RFC - ko wai e mōhio ana? A tērā tau ka taea e tātau te whakatūpato i te katoa o te studio kia hono...
